Serve & Return Interaction
How does it help the developing brain?
Did you know that unlike a baby’s heart or stomach, the brain is not completely developed at birth? As per the Center on the Developing Child at Harvard, the brain reaches about 90 percent of its adult size by the time a child is 5 years old…before a child starts Kindergarten, and most of this development takes place during the first 3 years (more than 1 million new connections every single second – a pace never repeated).
“Genes provide the basic blueprint, but experiences influence how or whether genes are expressed. Together, they shape the quality of brain architecture and establish either a sturdy or a fragile foundation for all of the learning, health, and behavior that follow.” - Center on the Developing Child at Harvard University
In the brain-building process, neural connections are shaped by genes and life experiences – namely good nutrition, the environment, relationships, and the amount of time a parent and/or caregiver spends with the child (singing, reading, speaking, playing, nurturing, caring). Plasticity, or the ability for the brain to reorganize and adapt, is greatest in the first years of life and decreases with age. What does this mean? Parents and anyone helping parents take care of their child in the first few years are shaping a child’s mind which has a significant impact on a child’s future. In a way, “the first years last forever”.
"The most important period of life is not the age of university studies, but the first one, the period from birth to the age of six."- Dr. Maria Montessori
Yes, parents and caregivers have a major role to play in a child’s brain development. Yes, the brain building process does sound intimidating. But, you don’t need to be a scientist to shape a child’s developing brain.
"The most important thing that any parent can do to support the development, and particularly the brain development of a young child, is to get to know that young child, get to be able to read that child’s cues, get to be able to engage in what we call “serve and return” interaction." - Dr. Jack P. Shonkoff, M.D. Director, Center on the Developing Child at Harvard University
What is serve and return interaction?
"Serve and return" is like playing tennis, ping-pong or volleyball and helps with interaction in both directions. A baby serves a smile, a coo, a babble, a gesture, and the parent or other adult caring for that child returns a response that is connecting to what the baby did. Baby makes a sound; you make the same sound back. The baby points to something, you say, "Ball, you want to play with the ball?" Your toddler is throwing food on the floor or refusing any more food or having a tantrum during meals. You ask him if he is full or "all done" with his meal. Maybe he does not want to try the new food? Is he bored? Is he hungry for your attention?
Serve and return interactions shape brain architecture. When an infant or young child babbles, gestures, or cries, and an adult responds appropriately with eye contact, words, or a hug, neural connections are built and strengthened in the child’s brain that support the development of communication and social skills. The child can start it. The parent can start it. The key is how you respond.
Research also confirms what parents have always known by intuition...it is the everyday moments of comforting, showing affection, loving, caring, and playing with children that builds strong and healthy brains. BTW…there is no scientific evidence that responding to a crying baby causes a baby to be clingy.
Parents who are dependable, consistent, respectful, and responsive to their children help them develop a sense of security and trust, which in turn leads to independence. Moreover, as per the Center on the Developing Child at Harvard University, the single most common factor for children who develop resilience is at least one stable and committed relationship with a supportive parent, caregiver, or other adult.
"Serve and return" is not necessarily something that works the first time you try it. But the more you practice it actually gets easier. And your child is "learning" so much during these interactions.
5 steps for brain-building serve and return interaction
Share the focus: “What’s this? Do you want to read this book?” or “Yes, that’s daddy’s hat.” or “What are you pointing to? That’s a fan. The fan is up.”
Support and encourage: “That’s right!” or “Thank you” or even a facial expression
Name it: A person, a thing, a feeling, or even an action. “Clean up, clean up, everybody everywhere.” or “You like playing with Teddy. You look so happy.”
Take turns back and forth: When you return a child’s serve, give the child a turn to respond.
Practice endings and beginnings: Children will let you know when they are ready to move on or start or end an activity. You can then “share the focus”.
Watch this in a 6 minute video?
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